Please tell me I’m not alone: Sometimes, we women could use a little help to make a man feel loved. I’ve got your back with these twelve ideas.
7 Attitudes That Will Make a Man Feel Loved
- Don’t micromange him. Isn’t it great not to have your every move questioned? Give him the same gift and focus on managing yourself rather than him.
- Treat him with kindness. If you don’t think he deserves it, remember God’s kindness toward you–when you were His enemy, no less (Romans 5:6-11). Also, if you’re married, remember you’re one flesh with this man. When you treat him well, you’re pampering yourself.
- Listen without trying to fix him. Seek to understand, know, and empathize. He’s not a project to conquer; he’s your closest neighbor.
- Turn that grumble against him into a prayer. Instead of bemoaning his lack, bring it to the One overflowing with goodness, generosity, and power.
- If you have children, resist jealousy when he gushes over the kids. C’mon, you adore them too. Rather than wallowing in jealousy when he delights in them rather than you, choose to thank God that he loves his kids. This is a beautiful gift. His love for them doesn’t take away from his love for you.
- Overlook that offense. So it seemed rude. But maybe he didn’t mean it that way. Even if he did, you’ve been rude too, right? Ask God to help you be slow to anger, like He is (Prov. 19:11). And if you’re married to a controlling man with a pattern of abuse, please seek outside help rather than staying silent.
- Ask God to satisfy you with His love rather than looking to your man to do so. I’ve had this Shane & Shane Psalm 90 song on repeat lately. Check it out. And remember, asking God to satisfy you with His love won’t happen without effort on your part. Continue to zealously prioritize cultivating your friendship with Him.
5 Tangible Ways to Make a Man Feel Loved
- Put your work aside and spend time with him. It’s too easy to rush past each other. Schedule time on your calendar if you have to. We call ours “Pig time.” (Strange, I know.)
- Let him grow that beard or wear that hideous-looking shirt. My husband currently likes a pair of sneakers that look like fruity pebbles collided with an avocado. For the record, I’m not planning to buy them for him. But I do think we women need to relax a bit and remember our friends’ opinions aren’t as important as we think.
- Write him a sweet–or alluring–message on the bathroom mirror. Remember the early days and get creative. (Oh, and be sure to use a dry erase marker.)
- Make him a mini charcuterie board. Trevor has worked from home ever since the pandemic, and every once in a while I’ll put together a mini charcuterie board for him. It’s a lot of fun. Try something as simple as laying out crackers, cheese, pear or apple slices, pepperoni, and/or olives on a wooden board.
- Prioritize cleaning. You don’t have to clean the entire house, but what area might he especially appreciate you tending to? (If cleaning seems like your greatest nemesis, read this.
Is there anything you would add to my list above? Also, does anything I’ve included here trigger you in a negative way based on your experience? I’d love to learn from you.
Paula (Hendricks) Marsteller is a compassionate Christian communicator.